What Tempts You?

Do you know the things that tempt you to turn from Christ?  Can you name the things that whisper and deceive you; which cause you to doubt that Christ is sufficient for all things in life and godliness?  And when you turn from Christ, can you identify the idols that you have constructed in His place?  I know one of mine, control.

I am tempted to turn from Christ in order that I may be in control.  For when I am in control I can then be autonomous, and thus not have to depend on someone outside of myself.  Control whispers in my ear and deceives me into thinking that if I was in control of my life then I would truly experience freedom.  Control tells me that I am good and able.  Once deceived, I then doubt God’s wisdom and goodness for not allowing me to be in control.  When control is on the throne of my heart I seek to establish myself as all knowing, instead of God.

If I am not careful to renew my mind on Scripture, several things can entice my flesh towards worshiping the idol of control.  Several of those things are: to do lists, self-discipline check-lists, and mommy blogs which focus on external are just to name a few.  Basically any obstacle that can be boiled down into several measurable, doable steps tempt me to turn from Christ and trust in myself instead.  Once enticed, I forget that I am a sinful being and my heart deceives me into thinking that my problem is primarily outside of myself and if I just do good and try hard I can overcome any outward obstacle through discipline of my behavior and actions.

Before I was saved I was a modern day Pharisee.  I was self-righteous, moral and proud.  I measured myself against others and thought I was going to heaven because I was better than others.  So perhaps my aversion toward anything involving self-discipline is an over reaction to now seeing my sin so clearly.  But this is the time of year I get a little fearful because after Christmas ends, and decorations are packed away, the thing waiting around the corner are New Year Resolutions.  And the idea of creating resolutions for myself both entice and appall me at the same time.  I do see areas of my life that are out of order.  The idea of constructing duties and tasks in order to get my body, house, finances, marriage and parenting into order is attractive.  Ultimately my love of control comes down to the idea that if I can control my circumstances then that means that the problem is outside of myself, and therefore I am not at fault.

But this year, as the days go by and January approaches I am no longer fearful.  Why?  Because I realize that my failure at self-discipline is not for lack of a day-planner, or organization chart, or strict regimen – but rather the issue is me.  My problem is not external influences.  No.  The issue is inside me – my imagination.  The battleground is not my circumstances, events, and surroundings, instead it is inside me in my heart.  My conscience informs my imagination.  Therefore I need to train my conscience with the Word of God so that the Word of God is the source of the imaginations of my heart.

You see, discipline is good.  I need discipline.  But in my sinfulness I have distorted and twisted discipline.  I have wrongly approached discipline with the understanding that I am sinless, or at least able to lessen my sinfulness through outward behavior.  When the topic of disciplining myself is brought up I am disgusted because I have forgotten my identity.  By remembering my identity as Christ as my Lord, it reminds me who I am, my weaknesses, my helplessness and my hope found in Christ alone.  It is that truth that compels me now buffet my body, to instill discipline in my life to guard me against myself in order that I might know Christ better.

(Two sermons helped me think through this topic.  You can listen to them here.  They are from John MacArthur about the art of self-discipline.  He explains why we need to be disciplined along with some tips as to how to be disciplined - but most importantly he explains the the right motivation.  I hope you are encouraged as I was to listen to them.)